6 truths about breastfeeding that people forget to tell new mothers!

Breastfeeding is a beautiful, natural experience that builds an unexplainable bond between mother and child.  Breastfeeding is the best way for a mother to feed her child, if she is able.  With that being said there are some things that us breastfeeding veterans neglect to tell new mothers while we are giving them all of the flowery rhetoric about how magically and wonderful breastfeeding is.  Believe it or not, despite all of the benefits and joys that come along with breastfeeding there are also some aspects that are not so great, if you are not prepared for them.  I like to give people the whole story because I believe that the benefits of breastfeeding far outweigh the sacrifices, and if women know what to expect ahead of time they won’t be scared, stressed or disgusted when faced with an obstacle!

11.     For the first month or two your baby will want to eat ALL the time!!!

Once your milk comes in good (2-3 days after delivery in my experience) expect to be an on call feeding machine for your newborn.  The doctors will tell you to feed every 3 hours, and in a perfect world having a “schedule” would be such a blessing.  But you baby’s body knows what it needs and sometimes it is every hour and a half to two hours, and some nights it will seem like the feedings never stop!!!  So be prepared, keep water on hand to fight dehydration and sleep when you can because you may have an adorable appendage hanging from your boobs for 6-8 weeks.

22.     Your breasts will be sore!

People will tell you that breastfeeding doesn’t hurt...and if you are doing it properly it won’t hurt.  But that is like saying that working out doesn’t hurt, and it doesn’t, but it will leave you sore!!!  So don’t be alarmed if you notice that your nipples and/or breasts are tender, tenderness is to be expected.  Try using a nipple cream like or even coconut oil, which I personally prefer.  But if your breasts become red, hot, or you experience sharp shooting pains call your doctor ASAP because you may have an infection.

33.     You will smell like milk.

Shower as much as you like but as long as you are breastfeeding, especially during the first few months you will smell like milk.  Don’t worry; as long as you change your breast pads often the only people who will be able to smell it are you and your baby.  With my first baby I was so concerned that everyone around me could smell my milk, but my mother assured me that she had know idea what I was talking about and that I could smell it because it was right under my nose!

44.     That tingle is normal!

When it’s time to nurse I always say that my “Spidey senses are tingling” because there is an unmistakable tingle that you get when it is time to feed your baby.  This tingle doesn’t hurt but you may find yourself unconsciously reaching up to grab your breasts when they begin to tingle!

55.     Full breasts are very uncomfortable!

A breast pump is a great investment if you plan to breastfeed and you won’t be able to feed directly from the breast all of the time because full breasts are NOT fun.  Full breasts feel like you are carrying ultra-sensitive concrete bricks on the front of your body, and the slightest touch or breeze send you a friendly reminder that you need to feed your child ASAP.  Full breasts can also cause engorgement, which is a clogged milk duct, needless to say a painful experience.  I was on vacation and became so full one time that I hand pumped my milk just to relieve the pressure!

66.     Breastfeeding will leave you starving and exhausted!

During a breastfeeding session you may find it hard to keep your eyes open or to keep your stomach from growling...or both!  Breastfeeding burns calories, which can make you both tired and hungry (thirsty too!).  Experts say that you should consume 600 extra calories a day while breastfeeding to compensate for what you will lose.  It is always good to keep some snacks handy while breastfeeding, I keep animal crackers and applesauce on my nightstand for a quick pick me up while nursing.

Even with these “inconveniences” of breastfeeding I chose to breastfeed all 6 of my children, (currently breastfeeding the baby as I type this) and I wouldn’t trade it for the world.  So even though breastfeeding isn’t all rose pedals and sunshine I feel that if you go into it knowing what to expect it will be one of the most fulfilling experiences of your life!

Top 5 reasons why I breastfeed

Top Five Reasons why I breastfeed

Since last week was World Breastfeeding Week and I am on the cusp of giving birth to baby #6 I decided to write a blog dedicated to some of the reasons why breastfeeding is the best choice for me!  I have 5 years of breastfeeding experience under my belt and I wouldn't have had it any other way.  Hopefully this blog will lend support to someone who isn't sure that breastfeeding is the right choice, or maybe it will inspire a sister who is on the fence about breastfeeding to give it a try.  Whatever purpose they may serve here are my top five reasons for breastfeeding!!!

1.  I’m Lazy!!!

Number five on my top five reasons why I choose to breastfeed is simply because I am lazy.  I am the mother of 5 (soon to be six) children, I am an entrepreneur, and a performance poet among many other things.  I wear many hats on a daily basis, which coupled with the fact that I have Lupus often times leaves me DRAINED.  So waking up every two-three hours in the middle of the night to mix formula and make bottles is not my idea of a fun time.  On top of mixing formula and making bottles who wants to clean bottles.  I mean seriously I have 1,001 things to do from the time I wake up until the time I go to bed and nursing makes my life so much easier, I can just pop out a boob an keep on pushing.  So as shallow and petty as it may seem one of my top reasons for breastfeeding is pure, and unadulterated laziness!

2.  I’m cheap!!!

Not only am I too lazy to mix formula, make and clean bottles I am also too cheap to buy formula, bottles, nipples, bottle cleaners and all of the other products that come along with bottle-feeding!  When I go to the store and look at the price of formula I nearly breakout in hives at how expensive that stuff is.  As a matter of fact it is so expensive that some stores keep it behind the customer service desk because it has become a high theft item.  I think that it is sad that mothers have to even consider stealing milk for their babies when there is an ample supply right under our shirts!

3.  Breast milk is easier to transport!!!

Being that I normally roll with three or more children at one time I try to keep my baggage to a minimum.  So one of the beautiful things about breastfeeding is that it allows me to pack light when moving around with my little ones.  I don’t have to lug around all of the essentials that come along with bottles and formula, which is a huge relief for me since I will have two little ones in diapers and three in car seats, so that extra equipment would just be exhausting.

4.  Breastfeeding helped me drop the baby weight!!!

One of the biggest perks of breastfeeding is that it is one of the best ways to drop those extra pounds picked up during pregnancy.  I have never gained less than 90 pounds during a pregnancy so people are always surprised at how fast I drop my pregnancy pounds and how I maintain my figure after having five babies.  For all of those people who want to know my secret here it is... A.) I breastfeed and B.) I workout...and that is it! 

5.  Breast milk is the best for my baby!!!

The number one reason why I chose to breastfeed each and every one of my children is because breast milk is the healthiest choice!!!  I became a mother for the first time at 19 years old.  I read every book and magazine about babies and motherhood that I could get my hands on because I wanted to be the best mother that I could be.  One reoccurring theme that I came across in my studying was about the overwhelming benefits of breastfeeding.  After breastfeeding 5 (soon to be six) babies I can say that none of them has ever had an ear infection, and they are rarely ever sick.  I also feel that nursing creates a bond between mother and child that cannot be duplicated.  With all of the questionable food on the market these days knowing that my baby will get food specially made just for him brings me great joy and comfort, because at the end of the day breast milk is the best for babies!!!

Fighting for Eve's Innocence

My new book of poetry entitled "Fighting for Eve's Innocence" has been finished for over a year.  The book has been patiently waiting for me to be ready,  waiting for me to be still enough to give it the love and attention that it deserves...and I am almost there!  "Fighting for Eve's Innocence" is about being holistically woman to the best of my understanding.  The title represents the battle that women around the world fight daily.  It represents a battle that transcends race, class, educational level, income, religion, political affiliation and sexual orientation.  A battle to live outside of boxes built to imprison us, and color outside the lines drawn in order for us to paint "pretty pictures".  We as women have been the scapegoats of society, bearing the weight and responsibility of all the wrongs of the world while being denied the praise and benefits of what goes right.  This book is an acceptance of dualities, this is my manifesto for the mothers of mankind...they say the pen is mightier than the sword...so this book is me bearing arms!!!  Be on the lookout!!!

National Poetry Month Poetry Challenge 1 of 30...yeah i'm late, poets are always late!

National Poetry Month is on of my favorite times of year!!!  Mostly because it is in April and I love spring...but I love poetry as well.  It is always fun to see all of the "poetry challenge" posts on social media sites along with all of the awesome poetry events that go on during this month.  I love the poetry challenge but being a mother of five it is hard for me to make any commitment past taking a shower and brushing my teeth on a daily basis!  So I am going to humbly attempt to write 30 poems in 30 days, even though I am a spur of the moment, middle of the night, while i'm driving with no pen or paper in sight type of writers.  I am already 10 days late and playing catch up, so these 30 poems in 30 days may never come to fruition...and if not, oh well, it could be worse!!!

Epilogue of Clementine

Life Actually

Rhapsody wrapped in beautiful tragedy

Causality of my own calamities

Clementine

Coal miners daughter

Got to close to the water, mesmerized by my own reflection

I got carried away

Hopefully one day

School children will sing songs of my demise disguised by innocence

Death is so poetic when paired with the right melody

Sing the song of my transition in a key of transparency

Let them see me for what I really was

Am

Always will be

A girl who teeters near the fringes

Fear of falling is not a strong enough deterrent

The rumble of the current sounds like the ancestors speaking in drums

The whispers of the waves call me to wade in the brine

The divine is not sublime here

It is in your face

Up close and personal invading personal space

Bold and thrilling

Fulfilling private prophecies

Weaving me into the tapestry of God’s property

I am not lost and gone forever

And I never will be

I am music

I am memory

I am mystery

I am free

"A Taste of Flint" Poetry, Music and Food wrapped in one event! You don't wanna miss this 2/15/14

"A Taste of Flint" 
2/15/2014
Greater Flint Arts Council
6-9pm
Tickets $10 (includes food)
Come out and experience 3 of my favorite things wonderful poetry, music and FOOD! Featuring music from Green Chi, poetry by De'Marcus Johnson,She'a Cobb, Crystal Turner, Stanford Lewis and Amber Hasan! This show will feature "Sensational Sauces" created by Flint Town's own Chef Duane Wardand food will be provided by Eazey's Smoken' Bbq De...This event is sure to excite the senses!!! Tickets go on sale tomorrow!!!

Why I Cook Black Eyed Peas for the New Year and A NEW POEM!!!!!!!

For the past few days I have had the strongest craving for black eyed peas!  When I woke up this morning it dawned on me why (No I am NOT pregnant again).  I believe the reason for my craving is because it is New Years Eve, and for as long as I can remember my mother, grandmother, and aunts always make black eyed peas on New Years Eve.  I believe that the tradition is centered around having good fortunes in the coming year, but seeing as though I am not a subscriber to luck I cook black eyed peas on this day for another reason and that reason is tradition.  I no longer have my maternal grandmother and great-grandmother in my life to turn to for wisdom.  I spent so much of my life being influenced by the examples of those two wonderful women, learning from every visit and conversation.     So even though I can no longer share physical space with those special women, on this day I can stir up their memories in a pot of Black Eyed Peas!  Everyone have a safe and happy New Year!

Peas In the Pot

Black eyed peas for the New Year
Not because I believe in luck
but because its what my grandmother did
it is tradition
Black eyed peas are never as good as they are on New Years day
tasting like my Granny's hugs and kisses
memories simmering
pots full of family
feeding spirits
reaching back and passing forward
I bring them with me in bowls full of knowledge
pot liquor poets
those women-folk who fed me
gave me recipes for survival
something substantial to chew on
to grow from
to digest
in my soul and in my flesh I was nourished
gave it to me straight
their truth gave me courage
the way that they flourished in the worst situations gives me patience
motivation
their is no "give up" in my blood
only black eyed peas
cooked on New Years eve
and bellies full of love

My mommy haiku aka "bout dat life"

I have been writing Haiku's lately...this one is for all mothers of the world, you are NOT Alone!!!

I can't Piss in peace/
Feet in my back while I sleep/
Kids are a mother/